Today I found out that Daria, of Daria-LivingwithCancer, is in the hospital and no longer able to post to her blog. This latest news was posted by her husband, Don. Daria has metastatic breast cancer. The trial she's been in has affected her liver. She was taken to the hospital last night by her husband.
I wish all peace and strength to both Daria and Don.
Daria is one of those people who I've never met, but whose bad news breaks my heart. Once again, I find myself with tears streaming down my face as I write about someone I only know through the internet. I read Daria's blog regularly. I appreciate that she dedicated herself to writing every day about what life is like with metastatic cancer.
So often, metastatic survivors are forgotten in all the survivor hype. In order to give hope to the many with cancer, sometimes those for whom cancer is not just a temporary setback feel ignored. They are not the cancer success stories; they are what we all fear. For any of you who missed it, there is a great article in the New York Times this week about life with mets, "A Pink Ribbon Race, Years Long."
There have been great improvements in detection, treatment, but especially in quality of life for survivors of all types of cancer. Through advocacy and awareness campaigns, many more people feel more capable of fighting their disease.
But the sad fact is that sometimes cancer comes back. All the feel good programs and empowerment don't change the fact that cancer, any type of cancer, is a terrible disease. The races and ribbons don't change that.
Yes, those of us who survive may find ourselves stronger. We may find new meaning in our lives. We may just be happy to not be dead. We are grateful for our health when it is good, and suffer when we hear of another in our community who is not so lucky. But we all lose something along the way.
I fear that some may find this all very negative. There is sometimes pressure to keep a positive attitude about cancer. The pressure comes from our loved ones as well as from some in the cancer community.
I do believe in focusing on what is positive and hopeful, but do not deny reality in the process. And the reality is that cancer is a terrible disease. It destroys lives. Cancer - all forms - still needs so much more advocacy, awareness, and, above all, research.
Cancer is not just a pretty ribbon; it's lives.
Julie
I wish all peace and strength to both Daria and Don.
Daria is one of those people who I've never met, but whose bad news breaks my heart. Once again, I find myself with tears streaming down my face as I write about someone I only know through the internet. I read Daria's blog regularly. I appreciate that she dedicated herself to writing every day about what life is like with metastatic cancer.
So often, metastatic survivors are forgotten in all the survivor hype. In order to give hope to the many with cancer, sometimes those for whom cancer is not just a temporary setback feel ignored. They are not the cancer success stories; they are what we all fear. For any of you who missed it, there is a great article in the New York Times this week about life with mets, "A Pink Ribbon Race, Years Long."
There have been great improvements in detection, treatment, but especially in quality of life for survivors of all types of cancer. Through advocacy and awareness campaigns, many more people feel more capable of fighting their disease.
But the sad fact is that sometimes cancer comes back. All the feel good programs and empowerment don't change the fact that cancer, any type of cancer, is a terrible disease. The races and ribbons don't change that.
Yes, those of us who survive may find ourselves stronger. We may find new meaning in our lives. We may just be happy to not be dead. We are grateful for our health when it is good, and suffer when we hear of another in our community who is not so lucky. But we all lose something along the way.
I fear that some may find this all very negative. There is sometimes pressure to keep a positive attitude about cancer. The pressure comes from our loved ones as well as from some in the cancer community.
I do believe in focusing on what is positive and hopeful, but do not deny reality in the process. And the reality is that cancer is a terrible disease. It destroys lives. Cancer - all forms - still needs so much more advocacy, awareness, and, above all, research.
Cancer is not just a pretty ribbon; it's lives.
Julie
6 comments:
I've been following Daria. My prayers are with this courageous woman. I'm a two-year ovca survivor, doing well at the moment, and yet I have no illusions about where this will eventually take me. In the meantime I try to treasure every aspect of every day.
Well said! Just found your blog. Attended the funeral today of a friend that died from meta. cancer. As a survivor, I feel guilty that my treatments worked.
Julie my thanks for your thoughtful, well written, post.
Daria's situation acts as a reminder that life is precious; time to live, love, laugh and, of course, don't forget to dance. Hugs xo
Yes I agree with you. The pink ribbon stuff annoys me. It's not what cancer is about. I have also been following Daria for a while and have been touched by her tough, practical, let's-get-down-to-dealing-with-it attitude. Now I just don't want her to suffer needlessly. I so hoped the trial worked but, as you say, it affected her liver badly and now she is going.....It feels strange that one can be so touched by someone one has never met. Thanks for this post. I don't think it is harsh.
I think it's a great testament to Daria that we all, from all over the world & with different cancers and different stages, have been touched by her spirit & her writing.
And, Anonymous, please, please, please, never feel guilty about your good health!! We all know how painful and, well, just strange it is when someone else dies of our disease. This year will be my 10th year as a survivor - I'm an old-timer now. There are a lot of people during those years that have died, many of them with vastly better prognoses than mine! It never ceases to upset me, and it never ceases to remind me how incredibly lucky I am.
We all get the very best care we can. We all have a will to live. We all fight in the best way we can. But there's a certain, seeming randomness to it sometimes.
I just hope that you can put aside the guilt - you've done nothing to be guilty for - you've just fought the best way you could. And I hope you can, instead, just be grateful for your good fortune.
Hi Julie
I checked out your blog after you posted on mine concerning the wonderful Daria. 50K in the snow!!!
I feel like a wimp for wanting dry pavement or at least the clay back roads near my house. I run almost daily but my weekly mileage is less than your 50K. Chemo left me with poor balance..doesn't seem a problem for you with the mountain climbing.
Anyway, I appreciate you helping cancer survivors continue to be so through exercise.
Post a Comment